All I Can Eat?

I just saw a commercial on TV for IHOP. The decidedly Uninternational House of Pancakes. First of all, I'm not sure what they mean by "International". Are they truly a multi national corporation or are they just referring to the many varieties of pancake on offer, Swedish, German etc? Secondly, it seems that some marketing genius has come up with "All You Can Eat Pancakes", an offer that you can enjoy with any breakfast priced $4.99 or higher. Pancakes? Effing pancakes? What mortal being can eat more than 2 or 3 of the fuckers? What kind of offer is that? Even if you really love pancakes drenched in syrup it's a shitty deal. Even if your nickname is "Shortstack" Jim MacHotcake and you are the current holder of the world champion pancake eating gold medal it's hardly a temptation. Maybe if you have a family of 10 who haven't eaten for 3 days it's worth the bus trip down there, but even then it's not exactly pushing the boat out. Thanks a lot IHOP! I have a good mind to go down there and sneak a trash bag under the table and keep ordering pancakes, then when the server turns around shovel them into the bag until I have ordered a hundred of them. Not like that would show them, I mean what is the cost of a pancake to IHOP? 1 cent? Maybe 2? That's the whole reason they are doing it. It's a can't lose situation for them. What about all you can eat bacon? Or cheese blintzes? No way, too much risk.
I am very interested in knowing what kind of person takes advantage of this offer. I might go down there, with a notebook, camera and tape recorder under the guise of a rookie reporter on his first assignment for the local free paper. Interview the manager, the servers and some of the patrons gorging themselves on stacks and stacks of fluffy buttermilk hotcakes. It sounds like fun, but what would I gain from it? I might get some free pancakes as a bribe for a good review. Then who would be laughing Mr. IHOP? That's right, I would, all the way to the restroom.....