Never Going To Sleep Again....Ever
I really don't feel all that comfortable talking about it but need to get it off my chest. It's quite disturbing. I've been thinking about it all day and not in a good way.
I mentioned it to Mrs.W when I got home from work. She laughed at first but it seemed like a rather nervous "you scare the shit out me sometimes" type laugh. She has good reason.
Another odd dream last night. I've been having a few lately. I have not been taking my medication as prescribed because it was making it hard to wake up in the morning. I was taking it right before bed so I wouldn't forget but decided to try taking it in the morning instead. I'm always rushing in the morning though and sometimes don't take it. I am blaming the dreams on this change as the alternatives are not acceptable.
Last night, or rather this morning right before I woke up in a cold sweat, feeling very very ashamed indeed, I dreamed that I was giving Shrek a blow job........ There I said it. Laugh all you want to, you callous bastards. Just put yourself in my shoes.....It's a very uncomfortable feeling waking up knowing that you just fantasized, albeit unwillingly, about blowing a cartoon ogre. I'm not gay, I'm not gay, I'm not fuckin' gay!!!!! I don't have a thing for green ogre's with Scotch accents either.
Shrek wielding his weapon....the brute.This is bad. How the fuck do I ever sit with my daughter and watch Shrek 1, 2 or 3 ever again???? What do I tell her when she asks to watch the fucker? I will have to lie to her. I can't tell her the fuckin' truth can I? Why couldn't it have been Princess Fiona? Or even the donkey for fucks sake? At least then I could laugh about it.
I was going to blog about my weekend in San Diego. Took a couple of nights off from the club as the day job had thoughtfully organized a meeting in SD and was paying for the weekend in a hotel for the family. Nothing much happened though outside of me getting rat arsed on Friday night and feeling extremely poorly on Saturday. Besides, the Shrek dream this morning took the shine off things.
10 comments:
This requires some ANALysis.
Let's see...
It's really a dream about blowing Old Knudsen!
An ogre ... Knudsen's curmudgeonly.
Scottish accent ... I rest my case.
MJ - Fuck. You had better not be right. Knudsen would be okay as the kind of friend that you get drunk with and shout at the telly with, but as for a sexual partner I prefer mine with slightly less of a piss smell about them.
I'm hung like a don--key. Mj is right, it is about me and you know it, so did ya swalla?
Get in line Waring, we are all waiting for a bit of Knudsen jizz. It is said to have magical blogging powers!
Guzzle it and the posts write themselves.
Eddie you have been featured on OBBs maybe I should say sorry now.
Is Shrek circumcised?
What girl doesn't dream of gigantic green cock?
Oh wait, you contend you aren't a girl?
Well then, who doesn't dream of Knudsen's cock?
I think Shrek's sexy and he gets me all hot and bothered too.
(Insert maniacal laughter here)
you poor, addled s.o.b.
NEVER TAKE YOUR MEDS BEFORE BED.
first thing the a.m-NEVER before bed.
*snerk* really, i understand. must have been TERRIBLE. *snerk*
*snerk, snorkle*
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Knudsen - I managed to wake myself before he blew his muck. This is getting bad because now I'm wondering what I would have done in that situation. I hadn't considered it before now you twat. How much manfat would an ogre of Shrek's size spew anyway?
Ellie - Knudsen has been shooting nowt but tater water for years anyway.
Knudsen - Thanks for the press...
Dennis - His foreskin looked like a bright green leg warmer.
FH - His wife???
DBS - Judging by your comment on OBB, I am inclined to believe you.
FN - Thanks for the sympathy love. Of all the people I thought I might be able to count on you and what do I get? Sarcasm.....
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