Tales of nonsense and items of little interest, sometimes true, always poorly thought through. Less sophisticated than most newspapers and magazines.

Saturday, February 3, 2007

Pakistani Comedy

The last few weeks have been something of a whirlwind for me. A whole mess of parties and after shows littered with drink, drugs and wild sex. I’m exhausted and need a break from it all. I wish. The last few weeks have been a non stop tornado of accounting classes, work and a bit of sleep here and there. Nevertheless, I am exhausted and need a break from it all.
This isn’t going to happen.
At times like these I find a good laugh is as refreshing and energizing as a walk on the promenade at Blackpool in January. It’s been a bad day in Iraq, so there isn’t much to laugh at in the news. Well, there was that woman who had a 93lb tumor removed. The doctors just kept telling her she was fat and to eat less. There was some humour to be mined there, I just couldn’t be arsed with it. Instead I took to the internet and managed to find some jokes on a Pakistani newspaper website. Paki’s have never been renowned for their sense of humour and if this collection of jokes is anything to go by they never will be.

You Will Be Taking My Mother in Law Now Please


A miser entered a restaurant and ordered for curry worth half a rupee. A waiter brought him the curry. When the miser began to eat, he saw that a fly was floating in the curry. He angrily shouted at the waiter. "You brought the curry with a fly!" The waiter answered, "Then do you want a goat or sheep for half a rupee?"

Two men were sitting opposite to each other. At last, one of them said, "Pardon me, I am a bit hard of hearing, no doubt, but I feel myself totally deaf today. I am seeing you chat for an hour but I could not hear even a single word." The other man answered, "I was talking, I was taking chewing-gum."

A man entered a calm dispensary of a doctor and yelled, "Doctor, for God's sake do something for me. I was applying on the flute but, I committed a mistake to swallow it". Doctor answered coolly, "You should thank God that you were not playing on a piano."

An old singer turned up the stage. As he started, his artificial teeth fell down. Hastily, he fitted them into the mouth but as he began singing these fell down again. When this process went on for a number of times, a person said angrily, "Would you sing something or go on changing the cassettes."

A wife complained her husband, "Why did you say before our marriage that I was all your world." The husband answered, "I had not learnt geography, then. Now I have discovered a number of other worlds."

A man asked another man, "Where is Bhatti Gate situated? he replied, "It is near the Data Darbar." But I also do not know where the Data Darbar is?" he enquired. "It is near Bhatti Gate, he answered. The first man asked with surprise, "But I do not know where both of these are?. Both are very close to each other", the man replied.

First opium-addict: "What date is today?"
Second opium-addict: "It is Sunday today."
First opium-addict: "I am asking you the date, not the year".

Maybe they lost something in translation…….

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

People should read this.